Tales from the Dub Gee prt 2. the return of the kleptomaniacs

Look, i realized i haven't posted squat in a while, but, I have a good reason. In has become a prominent fact that many bloggers write about stuff that involves popular culture as well as the mainstream media. I have tried to stay away from this movement for 1 main reason:

I don't have the time or the patience to watch and research into bands or tv shows because it really bores me. Then if i started to post and give my thoughts and views about stuff, ppl would and will always say i have gotten my facts wrong cos i don't really know much bout ne thing

Anyways, i thought i would return to this original post of Tales from the Dub Gee because ppl seemed to find it interesting, as well as another experience has affected the course of my life

YESTERDAY, was Sunday. Weather was up the ying-yang and massive amounts of people were flocking to the beach. Me and my significant other, decided to follow the crowd and head down to the beach. After that my significant other was going to go grocery shopping as her parent was in Sydney.

We arrived at the beach around 1230pm and the sun was high (but not at its peak due to daylight savings in Australia). We headed down to our normal side of the beach, which was surprisingly crowded as most of the people usually swim in between the flags at the other end of the beach. After tanning and sleeping for a while, we decided to head into the water to have a quick dip. After being in the water for about half an hour, I realized that a rip was forming and we would have to go bak on to the beach for a while until the current died down.

When we got back to our towels and bags on the beach we had notcied a few more people had come down: a couple of surfies, a 'lad' and a 'ladette', and finally and old, obese drunk guy who was just there sipping his goon and checking out the scene (which means perving on girls). This group of people didnt really intimidate us as **l**n*o** and pretty much everywhere these days are full of perverts, lads and surfies.

Now for you people who are from overseas or foriegn to the subculture of 'lads' here is a quick rundown of them and how to notice them

• Wear striped polo tops or Nautica tops
• Have caps, often white caps
• Wear shorts, no matter what the season or what the temperature
• Are often white and skinny
• Are often from the western suburbs of Sydney and constantly spreading
  
• Like to graffitti
• Are aggressive and often look for fights
• Hang out in gangs and support each other if a fight begins

(picture & description taken from this page)

Neways so this 'lad', and this 'ladette' are on the beach when my significant other starts to notice that they are looking at us at increasingly regular intervals. At the time she thinks nothing of it. Another suprisingly awkard factor is that this 'ladette' is sunbaking on the beach DEH DEH DERRR in her BRA! Talk about indecency. The time is 1:20 now and I notice that the tide has died down. We decide to go down into the water now. As we leave my significant other stops and says 'I hope my stuff doesn't get stolen' jokingly. I replied there enough people around here to do sumtin if anything happened and we continue on into the beach.. BAD MOVE jeez i shoulda remembered at that time, that in this day and age no1 gives a shit about each other.

WE come back from a nice swim and my significant other freezes. 'Where the FUCK is my bag' she says n starts going into hysterics due from shock. I go talk to the surfie couple next to us, didnt notice anything (funny tho, they weere practically right besides us). I speak to the drunk guy. Oh, i saw that boy take it about 5 minutes ago.

Words in my head, "WHY THE FUDGE DIDNT YOU DO NE THING YOU SMELLY OLD BASTARD"

What did they end up stealing off my significant other? Her clothes, her bag, her wallet, her grocery money, her phone, her sun screen, HOUSE KEYS, sunglasses, and earrings. Talk bout good haulage, but seriously, why the funk do it for?


So after scanning all the bus stops and reporting to the cop station, what do we get out of it? NOTHING. Basically, the fuzz laughed, didn't want to report ne thing, and informed us of this pointless anecdote which goes something like this

"One day,one of my friends, you wouldn't know them, got all their pot plants stolen. They went to Dapto markets the next day and saw this women selling them. My friend said, 'those are my pot plants'. The seller then replies, 'No they are not, they are mine!' and then the friend sticks his hand into the pot plant and pulls out his house key"

hows that for a kick in the nuts for ya Russell

Anyways alot of stress has been caused over this incident and I would just like to ask why do people do shit liek this for? I mean some people aswell as academics argue that the crime rate increases during the hot weather, others say that crime rate increases parrallel to the unemployment rate , but does it really make any sense to actually go and steal something from another person jsut because you need a lil money, or you are jelouse of something they have.

Only shit like this can be pulled off in **l**n*o**, and that is the TRUTH, RUTH!!

Tales from the Dub Gee, YEAH BOIII

MORNING peeeooopppllleeee, and how are you? and hope your having a grande day

The topic of today is the place i live.

If you didnt already know (which means you dont know my true identity) I live in a small town outside of Sydney. The place is called **l**n*o** and its not actually a town, its more of a town that disguises itself as a city. Its actually not that far from the city (bout 50min drive/1hr 15 train) but wen you tell people from the city that you live there, people think its further away from there than Mexico. Anyways whats the town like? well ill turn your attention over to Lou Reed and John Cale to inform you...

So yeah, i hope that song was informing and motivational. Anyways what separates this small town from any other small town? NOTHING except for 1 substantial and crucial factor. Small towns are usually associated with predominantly white redneck hics. **l**n*o** is full of all different types of cultures and and paths of life. This is a positive for the town, but one must realise when journeying into this town even though there are all these different people, they still have redneck hic veiws and maintalities of life. Ethnic groups are always fighting over dumb shit and there parents are always tlaking about how good life is and was back at their home countries and how bad this country is. Get an effn grip, the only reason its shit out here and better over there is because every1 over there shares the same thoughts and values and here every1 thinks they are better than any1 else. And yeah, id also like to note that this maintality doesnt apply to all people, just the vast majority

To illustrate my point id like to give you a few short anecdotes from my life:

• When i came here from Saudi (used to live there) people said i should change my first name to George
• I was a social outcast from my primary school cos i thought the Baha Men were lame
• I was a social outcast from my high school cos i thought Limp Bizkit were worse than the Baha Men
• I was the only known and recognized person that was not from Anglo Saxon decent in my first high school year and after the events of 9/11 i thought id better get the eff out seeing tho my name was obviously muslim ( ie i got told to go back to Afghanistan by some older kid who singled me out, i thought id better not inform him that id never been there)
  
• Moved into a second high school were all the racial group hung only to themselves (ie Turkey Corner) and i didnt really fit in a category
• A Serbian kid informed me to the 'positive sides of beating your wife'
• A kebab shop guy informed me that there was gona be a huge fight at Cronulla the next day, we thought he was full of shit. he sure proved us wrong
• we got started on by a group of 40yr old men on Australia day (post-Cronulla) as we were walkin into an ice creamery
  

**l**n*o** is not all that bad tho, is got sum killer beaches. I mean i hate goin bondi n cronulla n stuff compared to **l**n*o**. You wana know why? **l**n*o** beach is practically deserted (the place we go, that is) except for in summertime, when topless uni students come... not that i look, but if thats ur thing then come on down!

Anyway last saturday nite, the 3rd, i went out to my gf/friends/bf 18th bday. He is Greeek so party was at the Greek church.He is a good kid and the place being such a small town meant that i actually a fair amount of people who were going. Free drinks, free food, what more can i say? There were a few unwanted guests who came in n tried to cause trouble, but they got kikd to the curb so that ended up alright. Anyways, about parties, you know when is that special time when ur supposed to leave and end the note on a positive? Me n my significant other did that. After we left, one of his relatives, as in older relatives, got her purse stolen wih apparently $6K inside it.. all the girls got depressed and started crying and all the guys got pumped and ready to haul ass. Good thing we left at the right time!

As we were walking out tho, the wierdest thing happend. I used to be friends with this dude n close friends mite i add. Everythin was goin sweet til he started doggin me to hang round one of my ex's. I didnt mind that, but wat started to happen is he started to lie to me about it, and lie about it constantly. This wasnt that cool n e more. I confronted him bout it, then he started to lie mroe and blame my current significant other. Then we never spoke again. Anyways after we left this party, we walked to a cross section and saw all these police and ambulances. As we came closer we realised what had happend and it came as a shock... My ex friend thing... had ... hit.. two pedestrians.. with his car. It was another LEFT Hand of HATE or RIGHT Hand of LOVE moment. I chose the right hand of love and ask if he was alright, luckily the cops had been nice and let him off with a fine and loss of license, he was facing alot more.TALK ABOUT AN EFFN COINCIDENCE as in walking out at the right time

This situation and situations like this can only be occur in a small town and i hope i have informed you to what the **l**n*o** is like, and that is the TRUTH, RUTH!